Sometimes it is best to sit back, admit defeat and press the reset button.

It’s true in video games and sometimes it is true in life as well.

Over the last 6 months, I have done just that – hit the reset button on my life. Some major changes have happened – some of those changes have been for the better, some have led to regrets, and others have lead to redemption.

Overall, hitting reset on my life has been a good thing.

I have reset my career.

I have reset my marriage and relationship with Hun.

I have supported the resetting of my family.

Just when I thought all was lost, life shows me that there is always a way.

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I quit my stressful job and took a huge step backwards in pay. But I also took a huge step backwards in stress as well.

I still have what I refer to as PTSD flashbacks – I still choke up and almost cry relaying the stress I was under to people who ask why I changed jobs. I have to turn away and bite my tongue when current coworkers talk about being stressed out in the current position. There is a night and day difference in what they and I perceive as a stressful job.

I’m enjoying the work….and yet…..there are regrets as well. When people ask me if I like my job, I hesitate. It’s not that I don’t like the job – I do – it’s just that I know I’ll be bored sooner rather than later. There is no stress and also no challenge to the work. I thrive on challenge, not monotony. The job was there for me when I needed it most, but I don’t see me staying here long term.

In fact, there is the possibility of me returning to the stressful department I just left, only in a much less stressful position.

I’m not sure if the fact that I’m thinking about it makes me crazy or not.

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Things came to a head with my family life.

I came to the decision that I would no longer live a home life that was full of disrespect and stress. It wasn’t fair to me and it wasn’t fair to anyone else who lived in our household. Rowdy was the catalyst.

So I informed Hun that he had a decision to make: Decide if Rowdy was going to continue living with us or if he was going to allow Rowdy to move back in with Jetsam. Rowdy was his child, I love him with all my heart, but I’m only the step-mom. I would support Hun in whatever decision he made. If Hun decided Rowdy needed to stay, then I supported him 100%. If Hun decided Rowdy needed to leave, then I supported him 100%. He had a choice to make. I reminded Hun that as the step-mom, I also have choices and my choice would depend on Hun’s choice.

Rowdy no longer lives with us.

I regret that the situation came to this. As much as I regret that the choice came down to this, I am enjoying the peacefulness that has descended over the household. Since he’s been gone, there has been one argument in our house. One.

Despite this fact, I miss Rowdy anyway and I wish he was back.

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Things were tense with Hun and I while we were deciding what to do about our family life. Things were tense between us because of my job.

There was so much tension that I actually looked for somewhere else to live.

I didn’t actually move out, but I was prepared to….

It feels like we are back to being newlyweds. We are enjoying a second honeymoon phase and it has been blissful.

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I’m hoping to get back into my blog. I’ve missed it, but have come to realize that taking a break was necessary. To those who read, thank you for your patience.

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